Liberated

Liberated, Set Free!  That's how I felt when I woke up this morning.  Although I have been writing every day; I have not felt the freedom to just write the way I want to, or the things I want to. Life has been very hectic for the last few weeks.  My mother has not been doing well. Waiting on her hand and foot because she is unable to do anything eats up your creative time. Before you go jumping on me for sounding so cruel hear me out. In April my mother fell in our bathroom and broke a rib. Because she takes blood thinners they took x-rays. This let to a PET and CT scan. This was followed by a biopsy. They discovered a mass in her lung that turned out to be stage 3 cancer. She has chosen at age 86 to have nothing done. She is a strong and stubborn woman and I love her very much.  Two weeks ago she woke up unable to breathe well. She asked us to take her to her doctor. She was in congestive heart failure so they gave her medicine.  This has resulted in 2-3 trips each week because the meds messed her  up. Then her blood pressure was too high, then way, way too low. She is so weak and confused she has been able to make it only to her chair, bathroom and bed. I've waited on her hand and foot.  This means about the time I get anything started she would need help with something. I was still writing in small snatches, but there were no long periods of time or continuity. So I took a challenge from Teach Write, LLC on June 11th. The challenge was to try something new  in our writing. I usually write realistic fiction.  I decided to work on a ghost story idea that has been floating around in my brain for a couple of years. The small bits of writing I would do throughout the day usually happened after  a conversation with my mom. She would say something out of the blue, reminiscing about the farm we had up north. Then she would start in on the house. That is where the idea for this story originated, the house.

Below is a piece of writing I submitted with my application for the STAR program at the Hermitage Artist Retreat. This piece was one of the things they asked me  about after I was awarded the residency.  I told them that it was a piece that came to me in a dream and when the muses were ready for me to write it they would let me know. Here is what I submitted.

They say there is no such thing as ghosts or haunted houses.  They are wrong.  I know, because I grew up in one.  Mine is not an unusual story.  It is not even that terrifying.  It just is.  This is a fact I have come to accept.  As a child growing up in Bluebell, Idaho I had few friends because of that house. 

  From the outside the house was a typical, two story farm house. My father inherited it when his grandmother passed away.  He repaired and fixed it up.  It stood out on the hilltop.  You could see It’s gabled roof a mile away.  The inside was a different story. 

Even now I lay awake listening, watching, waiting, for it.  I’ve been waiting since I moved out of that house.  I knew it was only a matter of time.  That time is now.  Both of my parents are gone.  A drunk driver took them away from me.  Now the house is calling me.  I hear it in the middle of the night, I see it in my dreams.  It waits for me, calling me to return.  I don’t want to.  I don’t know why it calls me.  Sometimes the shadows visit me.  In school my friends used to tease me when I told them about the shadows.  Then they would visit my house.  No one teased me after that.  Instead they stayed away from me.  It is as if they were afraid the shadows would follow them.

When I accepted the challenge this week, this story popped back up, but with a twist.  Now it is a middle grade story with excerpts from from the main character's mother's journal. I wrote bits a pieces, ideas and phrases throughout the week.  Come back tomorrow to read the beginning of my new middle grade novel, "The House That Haunts Me" You will be able to see what came of all of that writing when I put it together. After you have read it please write and let me know what you think. I want honesty when you reply. Suggestions are always welcome.  Thank you in advance. Looking forward to sharing with you tomorrow.